Welcome to Anti-Vax Island!

Imagine if all the anti-vaxxers moved to their own island where they had all the freedom they have been demanding…

“Well hi, fellow anti-vaxxers!!

A big, we-all-know-COVID-is-bullshit welcome to Anti-Vax Island, our tropical sovereign resort paradise where we can finally express ourselves… with freedom from those vaccinated sheeples.

People have been dying to come here!

You won’t find any of these in the Anti-Vax Island minibar!

Right now, our lovely coughing, mask-less hostesses are serving your complimentary Anti-Vax Island welcome cocktail, ‘Giddy Up’… with 666 shots (sorry, I shouldn’t use that word) of Ivermectin and bleach.

First up, I would like to apologise for the lack of mobile phone reception on the island, obviously none of us have been injected with Bill Gates’ 5G towers.

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A special Anti-Vax Island welcome to you professional sportspeople, including NRL, AFL, NHL, MBL, NBL and tennis players… oh… a very special I-will-not-reveal-my-status-whether-I-have-been-vaccinated-or-not greeting to you Novax … you will be residing in our luxurious Vax-Vacillation Villa.

Karens, COVID deniers, Big Pharma conspiracy theorists, I am sovereigns, those who did their own research, New World Order aficionados, it only kills old people people, ‘You can’t tell me what to put in my body’ guests and those who think the COVID vaccine will make you magnetic… you don’t like being told what to do or think, so you will need to find your own accommodation on the island.

I’ll let you get settled in, then we’ll start our super-fun Anti-Vax Island activities!!

You’re going to love it!! We’ll be rewriting our DNA, learning to say ‘You can still transmit the virus even if you are vaccinated’ in ten different languages, a bible study class to prove Jesus wasn’t vaccinated, coming up with even more abusive terms for Chinese people, holding your breath for three days to prove you don’t have the Coronavirus, different ways to scream ‘SEGREGATION!!’ at café staff and finally… a cooking class on how to make delicious hydroxychloroquine meals with cow urine pairing.

So welcome again to Anti-Vax Island, where as the song says, you can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.”

©Steve Williams 2021

Dear COVID-19 anti-vaxxers, fuck right off

Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison was all over the news today, thankfully for not having a beer at the footy or jetting off on a Hawaiian jaunt. That’s a bit unfair, he has handled the pandemic quite well. Morrison has signed a letter of intent with biopharmaceutical company AstraZeneca to produce 25 million doses of a COVID-19 vaccine currently being tested. Not surprisingly in the outrage culture of 2020, debates have already kicked off over Morrison’s use of the word “mandatory”.

Of course a COVID-19 vaccine should be mandatory, unless for 1000% genuine medical reasons, as in the vaccine recipient’s arm will fall off, or they’ll drop dead. Even the arm excuse isn’t good enough. Most of us have a spare. Religious reasons? Don’t care. Surely your religion preaches something about being selfless and looking after your fellow man / woman / insert other option here… etc etc.

No doubt the nutjob-tin hat-wearing anti-vaxxer-sovereign-citizen brigade will emerge from wherever they emerge from. They’ll be spouting some pseudo-constitutional human rights charter bollocks they have dreamt up and gleefully shared in their pathetic little Facebook groups.

These selfish bastards have been out in force across the globe over having to wear masks and adhere to totally understandable travel restrictions. Australian standouts include the obnoxious “Bunnings Karen” and one Eve Black who refused to comply with a police officer at a checkpoint, while filming herself for social media. The officer who endured her rant should receive a medal for showing great restraint in not shooting her.

Anti-vaxxer morons can fuck right off.

They spout their hilarious bullshit that Bill Gates wants to create a new world order by injecting us all with 5G towers, while the lizard-people Royal Family wave on. Or something.

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The trouble is, it’s not just random nutjobs… it’s also high profile politicians — the usual suspect Pauline Hanson — and media “personalities”, so-called celebrity chefs and more, who unfortunately have, or are given a voice. These people are ignorant and dangerous and should not be given any media oxygen, but obviously they will.

It’s not about them or their “freedom”, COVID-19 doesn’t discriminate. Hundreds of thousands dead, lives decimated, economies in the toilet. A vaccine is all we have to try and claw our way out of this.

Anyone who refuses the COVID-19 vaccine should be banned from stepping outside his or her house. Or better still, left to rot on Manus Island where refugees en route to Australia are cruelly imprisoned. These anti-vaxxers are entitled to nothing.

My slightly dodgy lungs have a vested interest in a successful COVID-19 vaccine. Like millions of others, I have pretty much been in self-imposed lockdown for months. I leave the house only when I need to, and the very odd occasion I’ve caught up with friends. I’m not paranoid, just measured.

I can think of a few better ways to spend my time than face down on a hospital bed hooked up to a ventilator. Wear a mask. Get the vaccine.

©Steve Williams 2020